Rosier goggles

I intended to blog yesterday. I was feeling down and a little overwhelmed, and not a little frustrated with myself. I was going to say something along the lines of "wanting to suck the juice out of life, but having a hard time getting through all the damn peel"
I didn't get around to it (*irony*), and I feel less like that today.

Maybe it's because my monster cold has eased up on me a little. Maybe it's because the sun is shining. Maybe it's because it's Friday, and it's hard to feel overwhelmed on Friday when nobody has to go to work/school for two whole days and I can suck up time with my loves. Maybe it's because Damien is done with basketball for the season. Maybe it's because Patrick rearranged the living room and cleaned out my car and mowed the lawn. Maybe it's because Emily got her science project done and turned in and got an A. Maybe it's because Cali didn't cry when I dropped her off at preschool.

Whatever the reason, I'm grateful for the opportunity to breathe (literally! Thank you su-phedrine) and enjoy life rather than feel burdened by it.

__________________________________

At breakfast this morning, Patrick and I are eating with Cali between us and she's counting out some change on the table.
5 pennies, 2 nickels, 1 dime.

Patrick is explaining the value of each and how the 5 pennies is the same as one nickel and the 2 nickels are the same as the one little dime.

p- "does that make sense?"

c- "kind of"

p- "it does! it makes 25 cents! Ha."

We smirk at each other, so clever.

Caliana furrows her little brow. "but there's only 8" She starts to count them.

"one, two, free, four"

Patrick interrupts. "not free. Money's never free. It's three, th th three."

Cali goes back to eating her breakfast. Patrick gets up. A few minutes later she looks at me and says

"THree, th, three"

Her little tongue sticking out, making the correct sound. We smile at each other.


No point or punchline. It's just another moment. Life. Family. Teaching. Breakfast. Joking. Smiling. It's the good stuff.

Things that have happened

but you wouldn't know because I haven't blogged for two months.

1. I actually turned 30, uneventfully, but I still got carded to buy a lighter the other day, win!

2. We had Thanksgiving the next day, which sucked. It was just us, I cooked, the kids drove me crazy, our oven stopped working, so our turkey was undercooked and inedible. But then we went to the movies after dinner and saw Tangled and the day was saved.

3. The day after THAT we went and cut our Christmas tree down, which was a splendid splendid day, with hay rides, baby goats, storytime with Mrs Clause, et al. Afterwards we went downtown for the city tree lighting which was laughable, but then I won a raffle and got a basket with hundreds of dollars of merchandise and gift cards, so yay me.

4. No, I'm not giving you a day by day of the past two months

5. I'm sure stuff happened in the first half of December, but I can't remember any of it

6. My new niece Jessa was born and she's perfect

7. Emily and I had our annual trip to the Nutcracker in San Francisco, where we cursed every red light through the city, because every time we stopped, the car would start overheating, and there was steam, and people were staring. We had a blast.

8. Christmas eve we went to church and then to my mom's where we had turkey and ham and visited and had a great time. And then Patrick and I stayed up allllll night putting ribbons and bows on presents, and painting and putting together Damien's skateboard ramp, and Caliana's kitchen and Emily's gymnastics bar.

9. Christmas, which was perfect. The kids were so happy and grateful and my mom came over and I made a really good dinner, which made up for Thanksgiving.

10. We threw a New Years party, with a whole crapload of sixth graders. It was crazy and fun and I'm forever traumatized by the thought that I have to raise at least 3 teenagers

11. My mom moved to Oregon :(

12. Emily started Level 5 in gymnastics, so we now go to the gym six, yes SIX days a week.

13. Damien started this season of basketball. They're 3 and 1.

14. I've taken approximately 50 pregnancy tests and been tortured by a period being 3 days late and more recently FIVE days late, thank you very much for THAT!

15. There's more, but now I'm distracted by thoughts of babies

I'll try not to stay gone so long, I know this is all thrilling and you all check back here every hour on the hour looking for my updates. Love ya's!

Can I have my grown up badge now?

I turn 30 tomorrow.

I'm ready.

A good friend of mine told me that she cried on her 30th birthday.

I'm excited.

12 years ago when I turned 18 and officially became an adult, I was 3 months pregnant with my daughter. I got maternity clothes for my birthday.
Everyone says that teens having babies have to grow up so fast, and it's true. I did, but that doesn't mean that you're recognized as such.

"you're such a baby" people said. And everyone felt sorry for me, and gave me pitying looks. The grown up responsibilities and challenges were there, but without first earning my place in a grown up world.

No one wants to rent an apartment to a 19 year old, a 20 year old, a 21 year old....
you're too young, you're not trustworthy.

And there were lessons to be learned, things I needed to find out the hard way, growing up to do, but I've shouldered the responsibilities, kept my job, found people to rent to me, bought cars, paid insurance, birthed and nursed 3 children, been to countless dr appointments, changed countless diapers, juggled work and daycare and college, thrown 23 birthday parties, been to 15 parent-teacher conferences, and dance practices and baseball practices and basketball practices and gymnastics practices, and recitals and parades and Halloween costumes and and and....

taught them to read, and to use their manners and to use the toilet, and have been responsible for their lives as well as mine....

and I'm not a baby.

Recognize.

30!

A picture post

Halloween:

At school

At six flags. Cali wore Damien's old Alvin costume. She was a big hit!





Post trick or treating:



The queen with her spoils




It's been gymnastics competetive season, so that means it's been all gymnastics all the time....practices 5 days a week, privates, et al.
It all culminated this past weekend in zones (which is like regionals for gymnasts). Emily was 3 tenths of a point from making states, so the season ended on a bittersweet note. Now it's time to start training for next season! Lol.

Random:

Damien with our cat Ashes






Emily with her boyfriend Jordan


My new sewing spot! No more moving it on and off the kitchen table!!




Caliana and cousin Jasmin practicing their gymnastics



and a quick pic of me so I don't feel left out :)

Beat at the meet

Emily had her 3rd meet of the season a few weeks ago. It was a great one, and she did well. Topped her best ever scores on bars, vault and floor and all around! She also qualified to zones, which was a major goal of hers this season.
She tied 2 other girls for second place on floor. The other two girls were called first and so the podium was quite crowded by the time her name was called. This was her first time placing in the top 3 and you could tell she wanted on that podium so badly. She put one foot on and eventually the other girls made room for her. She smiles so beautifully, her pride evident in that moment where all of her hard work is rewarded. We're smiling too, Patrick and I and the other team parents. We've become a close knit group and each other's children's successes are like our own children's.

Patrick went out to the car ahead of us, while Em and I hung back for a few minutes. I was making lunch plans with the other parents and Em was posing for pictures. She left that day with five medals and a huge boost in pride and confidence. We walked out to the car feeling great, and there was Patrick. Holding a tissue to his face....bleeding.

me: What happened? Are you ok?!?

Patrick: Yeah, some guy ran up and punched me in the face, said "oh sorry, I thought you were someone else" and took off running down the street"

me: are you fucking with me? (he does that.....a lot) Did you just get a bloody nose and make up some story?

Patrick: No I'm serious, I'm not much of a bleeder (this is true)

So we all exclaim over him and wow, that's crazy and he gets a lot of attention.

His summary of the event..... "I wish I could say that's the first time that's happened to me"

At least she's up front about it

Introducing herself to a little girl at the gym

"Hi, my name's Caliana, and I'm craaaaaaaaazy"


No doubt.

Feeling the love

If mushiness makes you want to vomit, click away, click away now. This is a post about my wonderful husband and it's a total mushfest.

We've known each other since we were 11, over 18 years now and I'm so thankful to be his wife. Here are just a few of the reasons why....

-He does most of the laundry

-He does most of the dishes

-Ok look, he does most of the housework period

-He does all of the yardwork

-He takes care of our baby girl every day....and he does it well, he works with her in her workbooks, makes paper bag puppets, builds forts, buries treasure in the yard for her to find, takes her for walks and bike rides, puts on her bandaids and loves her more than words can say

-He also gets up with her when she wakes up at night and lets me sleep

-He has cute freckles

-He doesn't like TV so I never have to fight him for the remote

-But he'll still watch a movie with me when I ask

-He makes me laugh

-He's a good cook

-He understands all my music lyric and old movie line references

-He calls me nicknames like "love" "life" and "my queen" and he means it

-He loves me unconditionally, more than anyone else on earth